Why do we, as women, allow the opposite sex to define our self-worth? Why do we surround ourselves with people who tear us down as opposed to build us up? And why do people feel the need to put other people down in order to make themselves feel better?
quote by me. apparently I made quite a splash on faceyspace this weekend after posting this because my monologue made its rounds on various status updates, both admirable and put-downish.
We all know that my motto is Why Do We All Have Differing Opinions If Not To Share Them? But I see a huge difference in a differing opinion and being downright mean. A bully, if you will. Maybe its because I am naturally friendly but I have serious issues with people being just plain mean. There is no reason for it. Voice your opinion, but what is the point in saying something specifically designed for no other intention than to hurt another human being?
I posted this quote on fb in response to a conversation I had with my best friend. Best friend, we’ll call her B for anonymity sake, broke up with her boyfriend of 2 years at some point over the course of summer and fall. This breakup had been a long time coming, and quite honestly I can’t even pinpoint a date when they actually broke up for good because for a while it had been an on again off again kind of deal. Both parties truly did love each other, however they made each other crazy both purposefully and accidentally. B hasn’t had the best track record with boyfriends, however I would have called the latest one the best of the bunch so far, even gone so far as to say that I can picture down the road them getting back together and in a more mature state in their lives, getting married and living happily ever after. I truly thought for a while that he was the best thing to ever happen to her. That is, until he said it.
B’s ex is now involved with a new girl. They have been dating some considerable amount of time, 3-4 months – and from the exterior she seems like a great girl and I was trying to be happy for him moving on and blah blah blah but turns out she talks shit about B and doesnt even know her so that bitch can fall in a pit of cow manure for all I care. The other night, the ex told B that he is still in love with her, that he is the best thing that ever happened to her, and asked her if she would date him again should things fall through with him and new girl.
SHUT THE FRONT DOOR
What on god’s green earth makes men think it is alright to request that we wait around to see if their new fling will work out, sit on the bench and just wait for them? Waiting around for a man is only acceptable in two situations – if they are in a time of grieving and you are NOT going to be the girl that jumps on a widower like its Black Friday at Walmart; and if they are active military. It is downright disrespectful for someone to even consider making a girl monitor the sidelines while they “see if it works out” with so-and-so. What woman in their right mind is okay with being told You Are My Second Choice?
If you want me, and you mean it – not just want me on the side, want me in your life as a serious thing — you want me now. Not later.
Now, after all that, I can truly say that maybe her ex was the best thing that ever happened to her – because after that lowdown dog move he pulled, she knows that she cannot allow her self worth be defined by a man.
Angry Owls 